Marriage Relationship Counseling For Couples - Getting Anxiety Counseling

Today there are many different types of stress that an individual might experience. Anxiety counseling is one type of therapy that one might seek if they are struggling with this problem. Additionally marriage relationship counseling can help a couple work out the problems that they might have.

Many different things can lead to serious problems with any relationship today. Financial strain and work stress can lead to arguing that creates even more stress. Additionally other problems such as infidelity or other types of addictions can also result in problems within the relationship.

When you are looking for a way to resolve the problems you are experiencing, you can turn to various forms of therapy to help you. Determining the right counselor will be important as each one offers you a different approach to resolving the issues. Because there are a number of things that you can do to solve problems today, you might find that specific methods work best for you.

In some situations, you might be seeking the help of a therapist to work through issues of extreme stress in your relationship that was caused by another person outside the relationship. There are a number of reasons that a relationship might experience stress. However, problems such as infidelity and other types of addictions can quickly result in a relationship ending if it is not addressed properly.

Determining the source of the issues will be the first step for any type of counseling whether it be for a couple or for an individual. In some cases, individual counseling may also require bringing in the rest of the family to help. When any one person is experiencing a problem, others around them are affected as well.

Marriage relationship counseling for couples will help a couple to restore their relationship or make the decision that the issues cannot be resolved. When you are willing to try to work through the problems, getting counseling will help by having a third party basically mediate the discussions and negotiations that need to take place. For any issues to be resolved, both parties need to be able to make changes to their behaviors and work with the other person.

Anxiety counseling is done in a number of different ways. The strength of the anxiousness that the person feels will first need to be determined as well as if it is a general anxiety or only toward specific situations. Medication may also be prescribed to help work through the issues by helping the person be more relaxed.

About Us: Deciding to seek counseling to help you work through problems can be very helpful. Visit http://www.renewyourpassion.com/ to learn more about the therapy choices available to help you get the help you need. Christopher Diggins, MA, LMHC 1424 NE 155th St #206, Shoreline Langley/Island County, WA, United States, 98260 Contact No. 206-930-7780

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My boyfriend's depression and anxiety is destroying our sex life

'He experiences post-coital tristesse after any intimate touching.' Photograph: Fuse/Getty Images/Fuse

I thought our sex life was great but my boyfriend lives with anxiety and depression that he refuses to see a doctor about. We're both 19 and this is our first sexual relationship. He experiences post-coital tristesse, not just after climax, but any intimate touching. It's damaging our relationship. He now says he only wants to kiss and cuddle. I'm not sure what to do. I love him but he doesn't seem to appreciate how it's affecting me.

It doesn't sound as though your sex life is "great", and I am wondering why you're continuing to bother with someone who's frustrating you to this extent? You obviously enjoy sex and consider intimacy an important part of a relationship, but your boyfriend is failing to take the hint.

Perhaps he's so depressed that he can't summon the energy to seek help, in which case you could make an appointment for him and take him to it. If he's simply afraid to address his mood and sexual problems, try to soothe him, but be firm about how this is affecting you and explain it's not an option to leave things the way they are.

Speak to him in a supportive way, saying something like, "You deserve to feel better, and I need that too" and, "I care about you, but it's hard to be with you while you're needlessly suffering." Give him one last chance then, if he refuses to be smart about this, move on; martyrdom is highly overrated.

‧ Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders

‧ If you would like advice from Pamela Stephenson Connolly on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to

private.lives@guardian.co.uk (please don't send attachments).

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Doc Chaves On Anxiety & More Of Your Questions

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"You're not alone in having sexual anxiety and worries about being with a partner." 

Doc,
I'm at a really low point in life, and it's all because my sex life has never been what I wanted it to be. I'm 31, never been with a girl sexually, have kissed, but have never done anything else. I've had opportunities to go farther, but I'm incredibly nervous around women and worry if they're going to like me or be excited by me sexually. Talking about it to friends and the girl I kissed didn't really help like I had hoped. What other things can I do?

You're not alone in having sexual anxiety and worries about being with a partner. Most of our readers can empathize and think back to times in their lives when sexual stress and performance anxiety impacted them. I find the origin of people's anxiety is a good place to start when beginning the process of managing or overcoming our sexual worries. Sometimes it's our childhood, attachment or past relational experiences. Other times, it can come down to simply not having enough education and exposure to help us feel prepared with sex and relationships.

For the first set of difficulties, sex therapy can be very helpful. Make sure it's a qualified, comfortable, open-minded sex therapist who doesn't skirt around issues like masturbation, fantasies, sexual concerns and anything edgy or uncomfortable. Make sure to get information about the therapist's education, degrees, history working in sex therapy and training history to make sure he or she is qualified. For the second difficulty, sex education, this is something you can work on yourself and make a dent in your discomfort with sex and confidence in the bedroom. There are hundreds of sex ed. books and instructional DVDs to choose from that will help you learn, get comfortable and grow in confidence.

Something else that can be more hands-on is working with a surrogate partner. The movie The Sessions put this art form of collaborative experiential treatment in full view of mainstream society. A surrogate partner (not an escort or prostitute) works alone in a session with clients to help them experience and overcome sexual concerns, intimacy difficulties and performance anxiety through communication, touch and sexual exercises.

Typically, a therapist works with the client on psychological aspects and collaborates with both the surrogate partner and client to devise a treatment approach best suited for the client. Everyone is different and what is most powerful depends on each client. Maybe an eye-gazing exercise opens the door to vulnerability for a client because they feel seen or witnessed by someone else. A cuddle or touch exercise can bring up emotions for clients if they have never felt the sensation and warmth of someone showing them affectionate touch. There are a variety of benefits to working with a qualified surrogate. Just like with a therapist, you should ask about their training, internship, experience and certification. Keep in mind surrogate partner therapy is not legal in all parts of the U.S., and some people travel to states where it is legal for intensive training.

Doc,

I have a minor complaint, which is you never post questions about older people and their sex lives. I'm 66 and recently widowed. She was my first love and the only person I have been with. I've worked through her passing and am now facing the prospect of dating, sex and finding someone new. Do you have any suggestions about getting back on the horse?

To lose a loved one is awful, and I'm sorry to hear about this. While this experience is tragic, I'm thrilled to hear you're going to begin a new chapter with sex and relationships. I know it's not easy and there will be a lot to process when you meet someone, begin dating, become sexual?and get into another relationship. The best advice I can give you is to point you in the right direction for a resource.

I attend a number of sexuality conferences to keep up-to-date on what's happening with sex. One trend I notice in the field of sexology is a focus on seniors and sexuality. You may hear different words to describe people of advanced age and their sexuality: "gerontology," "mature," "aging," "late-stage sexuality" and so forth. I prefer "senior sex." One of my favorite books to help people navigate sex in the later years is by Joan Price called Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud About Senior Sex. It’s hip, contemporary, open-minded and deals with the realities of sex for today's seniors, covering topics like medical issues impacting sexuality, sexual concerns, sexually transmitted infections and contraception, alternative sexuality, diversity of sexual expression, different orientations, and a host of other important senior sex topics. This book is a great start to getting back on the horse and feeling confident, empowered and prepared for the sex and dating scene. Next Page >>

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