Is there something to sleeping in separate beds?

I Love Lucy was alive and thriving in the 1950s. Conservative in nature, the show portrayed Lucy and Desi sleeping in separate beds in an effort to diminish any sexual relations between the couple. Even still, they managed to conceive their firstborn child, Ricky Jr. This all begs the question: Is there something to sleeping in separate beds?

After a long day of stressful situations that may include unruly children, nasty bosses and hectic commuting, the idea of a welcoming, freshly-made bed to rejuvenate feels like heaven on earth. But what happens if your sleeping partner snores, gets up to pee frequently or tosses and turns all night? At what point is it OK for a couple to sleep in separate beds?

“partners who sleep in separate beds have 20 percent less sex?

"By being in separate beds and rooms, you might get a better night's sleep," says Dr. Ava Cadell. "It means you can turn off the TV when you want and you don't have to wake up when your partner's alarm clock goes off."

Sleeping in separate beds also means less sex, obviously. J. Waterman, sleepologist and author, found that out of 100 couples, partners who sleep in separate beds have 20 percent less sex. Let's face it: If you and your partner are in separate beds or separate rooms, the frequency of sex tends to go down, and you can expect your relationship to follow.

Dr. Robert Oexman of the Sleep to Live Institute and consultant for Sleepy's invites you to think about why you want to sleep separately.

"Couples feel more connected and secure in their relationship when they sleep together," says Dr. Oexman. "Studies have indicated that couples may get health benefits from sleeping together due to increased feelings of safety, security and well-being. This shows that psychological impact of couple sleep should outweigh any negatives of how couples may disturb each other at night?— whether through sheet-stealing or snoring."

Dr. Oexman suggests that couples sleeping together buy the largest bed that can fit in their room to help give them 'distance' when they need it. He also suggests using separate sheets and blankets to reduce co-partner disturbance and difference in temperature issues. If there are issues of snoring or other sleep disorders, they should be treated. Sleep problems can be signs of other health conditions and couples should never ignore health problems.

If sleeping in the same bed is an important issue to you as a couple, but you cannot agree upon a suitable and comfortable mattress, consider a His/Hers bed. This is one bed where each side is customized for individual preferences. For example, his can be firm, while hers can be plush. This helps couples get a good night's sleep while staying together.

If sleeping in separate beds is an absolute must for you to get your sleep on, consider doing it on a schedule. "Spend some nights sleeping together and others sleeping apart," suggests Dr. Cadell. "If you want to get uninterrupted sleep, never make each other feel guilty for having separate beds." Dr. Cadell suggests crawling back into bed with your partner and surprising him or her with some sexy kisses, oral pleasure and sexual intercourse when they least expect it. Making a conscious effort to encourage and engage in sexual activity with your partner is important when sleeping in separate beds.

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At the moment where I knew there would be a second Date

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' As we continued to kiss, I noticed myself stroking and lies not so much in a sexual but in a loving manner, almost paternal. "

There comes a time in every relationship, but in short, when you realize that things are destined for failure. Sometimes, it is something that you, sometimes it's something she does, and often it is the fault of anyone. Whatever it is, these moments remain with us, engraved in our memories, as testament to our deeply personal trips through the romantic life. It is the attempt of a man to share very personal moments of his own.

This is the final installment of a series of five parts. Read the previous entry here.

Summers can be uncomfortable, but they can also be sexy. Anyone who has seen the movie grease knows this. At night, people fill the streets of the city. Clothing is minimal. The atmosphere is simple and relaxed. Everyone is slightly sweaty. And the boundaries between (private) inside and outside (the public) begin to evaporate.

Last year, I moved to New York in the middle of a heat wave of the summer. On my way to the city, U-Haul in tow, I stopped at the apartment of the girlfriend of my friend to pick up some furniture replacement who was as donnes. Fantastic furniture (I write on a snazzy desktop that I picked up here at the moment), but my friend's girlfriend had a wonderful roommate. She wore a one-piece provocative outfit to handle the heat, and I had the chance to talk to him as I fled the scene with his stuff. We do not discuss much, but being a new course and all, I managed to get her to agree to show me around his part of the city.

After a second successful date, I invited her back to my place, where we had a drink and I took her to the top of the fire escape on the roof of the building. The night was hot, the view was beautiful, ablaze the city lights and the solitude on the roof was romantic. We started to kiss. The feeling was electric. Her lips seem to fit so snugly into the mine. Our bodies were pressed against another. But then, little by little, something began to feel strange. As we continued to kiss, I noticed stroking me and lies not so much in a sexual but in a loving manner, almost paternal. I couldn't say if I wanted to have sexual intercourse with her or her crib. It was almost as if we had fast-forwarded our relationship and kissing like an old married couple, rather than as second-daters. The feeling was intense and intriguing, but quite unexpectedly-- and, to be honest, unwanted. I think we were both baffled by the sensation, although we do dare to discuss, and when we are on board with inside, things were awkward and shootings on after not too long. The next time that we have seen, a few weeks later, our sexual chemistry was even more out of whack. It was the last time that I saw her.

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